Britt’s Donut Shop
Pizza can fuck off
This place is located directly across from Frank's Pizza. Why am I reviewing Britt's? Because I can, and because fuck you, and because this bottle of Kentucky Supreme hasn't been drinking itself, that's why. Britt's is a magical experience. Eating a donut here is like sucking off a unicorn who ejaculates a molten sugar cloud of deliciousness directly into your soul.
This was, absurdly, my first Britt's donut of my entire, terrible life. I guess that's kind of fucked up since people drive hours to come eat this shit and I've lived vaguely close by for a while.
I don't know shit about donuts besides that they're fucking great. We used to go to some farm that made freshly-made donuts somewhere in Westchester, NY when I was a kid, but I don't think they had any of this glazed shit like Britt's has. If such an unholy beast existed nearby when I was a kid, I'd probably still be on the prolonged sugar high. I think my favorite donut there was a cinnamon sugar donut. Even with the rose-colored glasses of youth I can say that Britt's beats the shit out of whatever the fuck I was just talking about.
Zero recircs, this place is infinite. Buy a dozen donuts here, bring them into Frank's and eat them while humping all of the humpable things you can find in there.